Tag Archives: relationship

my least favorite question.

Last month I posted about a really big life change… a new job.  Since starting that job, people are constantly asking me how things are going.  I know this is natural. I know this is expected. I don’t always like it.

Last year was a very unique year… I changed jobs two different times.  That means I’ve had three different jobs in 2014! (Taxes are going to be a nightmare.) I’m no stranger to answering these typical “how’s the new job?” questions. I am surprised, though, at how difficult I find these questions to be.  For the record, I’m really excited about my new job. But that doesn’t mean that I have good answers to your questions… yet.

How’s the new job?!
Well, it’s good. But it’s a crazy transition. And in some ways, more difficult than I expected. Not in a bad way, but just in recognizing how my personality deals with transitions. I’m learning a new normal.  My life is less routine, and rather than being presented with a structured schedule, I am needing to figure out what my schedule should look like. There are a lot of meetings.  There are a lot of interruptions. There is a lot of flexibility.  I knew this would be the case, and I know I will find a way to make this work really well and I’m looking forward to those days of having a balance between structure and flexibility, but I don’t know when that will come.  So know that I’m still learning how to transition well.  Know that this will probably take much longer than I want it to and I might be giving you the same answer to this question for several months. Or a year.

Do you love it?!IMG_6248
I’ve been surprised by this question.  Numerous times I’ve been asked this question, or something so very similar. “I bet you’re soooo excited” or “Are you loving this new position??” … Here’s the deal.  This question confuses me. I know that this question means that others are excited for me and recognize my heartbeat and passions.  I know this question meets me with good intentions.  But I still don’t know how to answer it.  Or at least… I think my most honest answer is not what people are wanting to hear when they ask this question.  Several times that this question has been presented to me, I’ve been tempted to let out a very blunt “NO.”  Instead, I’ll offer up a confused but polite smile and agree that yes, I do in fact love it.  In reality, though, I think this question is absurd.  At least, absurd at this stage in the game.  Imagine with me for a moment that rather than a work transition, we are actually talking about a relationship transition.  One month in, and people are approaching me asking how things are going, and if I love this new relationship.  “Do you love it?” takes on a whole new meaning when you’re talking about a person.  IT’S BEEN ONE MONTH! Do you even know this person yet? There’s still so much to learn! Give it time, please.  This is how I view this question, and this is why it is my least favorite question.  Do I love it?  Well, I’m sure that I will love it.  Someday.  But right now I am still learning how to love it.  I am excited about it.  I am eager to develop and deepen relationships through this new job.  I am looking forward to the day where I feel comfortable and that I am able to excel at the logistics of this new job.  But right now… I can’t say that I love it.

Perhaps all in all, what I really want, is to change the conversation.  Rather than asking me if I love the new job, can we start asking how to pray me through this transition? I don’t have all of the answers yet.  But I knew what I was getting myself into when I accepted this job, and I’m eager to see what God has in store for me… and for this ministry.

“For thus says the Lord: … I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.
{Jeremiah 29:10-13}